*This space is reserved for the travelogue!

Kickstart to Term 2, and I am pretty much supressed by the tiring hours of standing. Like I’ve said before when I attended the Good Charlotte concert, my feet could kill me right now if they wanted to. Today’s lunch service, the perfect words to describe it has been used as this blog’s title. If it wasn’t for 9/10 of us asking that multiple times because we forgot the sequence of service (as if the hungry customers give a cow’s arse about it really), it was just plain MESSY!

I’d really rather write about my trip to Jakarta, but I’m way too lazy to resize the photos. This is ironic, I want to be a quality blogger with a quality blog, but I’m admitting I’m lazy to do it as we speak. Hm. Nevertheless, if I didn’t write about Jakarta, I’d write about how small this world is and why I prefer PJ drivers rather than Subang or especially Shah Alam drivers.

But I’m too tired to do that too. All I know is, screw Shah Alam drivers because they go out and buy cheap cars, spend thousands to make it go faster and when someone invites them to use all their horses underneath that hood, they instead get pissed off and blares their middle fingers at you. WTF, no comment. I say, if you wanted to drive at 70km/h, then go get a Kancil. At least people won’t be eager to tailgate you, hence pissing you off. If tailgating is supposed to piss someone who drives a fast car off, then I’m Jackie Chan’s stunt double.

The other day I got harassed, technically and literally by a friggin’ SUNNY! It got me worked up at first, but hey, the guy went pass me and raised his hand humbly. It’s not my Malaysian attitude speaking, but I say a hand raise is more than enough to ease the tension. But NOO, Shah Alam drivers dont play with friendly gestures, all they know is to slowly overtake you, stare at you, ram their engine, show their finger; JUST before they exit the road.

-___-"

Damn I’m rambling aimlessly again. Sorry, I’ll write about Jakarta soon, with pics. Again, the AOAS horoscope for every male and female who is reading this post says : this is a really small world, you’ll notice this today!

Until then.

Sometimes I say the wrong things,
go to the wrong places at the wrong time,
confess my love to the wrong people.

But please, don’t slaughter me just yet. Cats have nine lives, and I have three mistakes to make before learning my lesson. Damn, I feel like a loser. Of course, I lost.

That stands for lan c lan yong, which I *think* means a person who is arrogant and boastful in his act and words in chinese, it’s what Mr. Danial my lecturer taught me. I find it an appropriate title for this specific blog because what I am going to do appears to be LCLY indeed. I am going to copy the idea of two of my group mates for the content, and then follow by attempting to convince you that I’ve thought of writing this since a few weeks back, only I got very lazy and kept on delaying. Here we go, bear with me.

Happy happy joy joy. The perfect caption to a perfect picture of a perfect group. Seriously, who the hell am I kidding?! We’re DC27 Group 2, a bunch of crazy, cheerful, noisy, unpunctual, emo, smart (refer to FBSP 157 assessment please ) and did I mention noisy? people. I’ve only known them for 3 months and I’m already thankful I’m in this group, but I’m not saying this is the group for everyone. Other people love their group for their own reasons, and this one has it’s ups and downs too, thankfully the good traits work for my side, heheh!

So to follow the trend of every other loving group member, I’m going to introduce them and leave a word or two of my own thinking on what 3 month perception have I come up for them, here goes! We’ll start from the guy on the far right on the first row, subsequent to introducing my lecturer.

Mr. Danial Yong

-Yea, how ironic, introduce the guy who taught you the meaning to the phrase youre using for the blog’s title, so sue me. Nevertheless, Mr. Danial is one heck of a lecturer, he’s funny yet strict, forgiving yet firm with his principles. If there’s one thing I’ve learned so far in college is that if you’ve got a serious lecturer who’s damn unforgiving, then you’re in for a "lovely" evening. Thanks Mr. Danial, glad to have you for Term 2!

Han

-Ever met an accidental perfectionist before? No? Now you have, Han does his job clean and fast and he used to be a med student studying abroad and stopped half way. Imagine, his heart wasn’t even with the kitchen few years back then and he’s already adapted to the hustle and bustle of kitchen life, way to go! (I’ve been told that he’s quite good with the ladies too, yes, ladieS.)

Aniq

-The first ever manager + elected by lecturer based on "best" results from a written exam = one messed up restaurant. Yet he’s darn funny at times, and damn late for some classes too! Nevermind.. he can compensate for all this by simple stopping smoking. Say tak nak to saying tak nak to tak nak, Aniq!

Alvin

-Mr. Germany 2007 (and some say 2003). One hell of a funny guy thanks to his ability to mimic certain animals you’ve never seen before, plus sound effects. Sadly he’s leaving for Germany and will be joining DC28 upon his return. All the best with the Zimbabweians! We’ll miss ya, gay (Myvi).

Leon

-This 13 year old boy? Damn smart for a kid! ahahaha! He’s actually 20, but girls agree he looks way younger than that. Guys, well, we just agree on the height but nonetheless! his thinking isn’t short of how a 20 year old normally thinks. Girls, TFK, studies. Told you right? Also starring in a multi razzy award winning film soon debuting, Finding Emo. Hopefully with his cheeky smile he’ll get his little <insert sweet word describing a girlfriend here> soon!

Jimmy

-Known him since secondary. This guy is a hopeless romantic. Plus he’s just hopeless. Next..

Maynard (specky on the far right next to Han)

-He looks innocent, he sounds innocent. Truth is he’s quite wordy and most surprising is a pervert. Or wait, ex-pervert I should say, he claims he has evolved into being an adult and has given up pervertism. Smart fella, with good sense of humor, but a bit slow with the table settings just like me. Then again, Maynard and I are not that different, just that he’s from that end of the sea and I’m from this end.

Hadi

Hoodie the rempit. Man this guy is shy, seriously. No really, he’s shy! Hahaha! Guy’s got talent though, but only problem is he’s too quiet. So quiet that when he actually says something it’s damn funny! Accidental force of nature that can make anyone burst out in laughter, but please tone down on your wheelies and stoppies! Haha, just kidding!

Elaine

-My gossip partner (can say so la?), her face is so round we claim it to be the earth. She’s not funny. Haha! Has this special skill to hurt you whenever she desires by either hitting you or poking you at your weak spot. Can say quite smart la, good marks for almost every assessment.

Vincent

-Mr. Cautious. Always wondering the possibility to answering a question in an alternative way or resolving a problem using a different method. AKA too damn paranoid.. Oh well, his pros are that he’s always at college earlier than others, can sleep just before an exam and still get OK marks for it. Blardy hell. Quite reliable as he’s cautious. Dont look down on him ok, he’s not a virgin and he lost it to an Australian ass. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Mischa

-This girl is like a really old car with a clogged carburetor, she can be having a good flow of sugar and be normal, but when her lines are clogged then she’ll just play dead until the clog bursts and she’ll start laughing or hitting people or biting people. She’s kinda little, but hey, little people are adorably ugly right! That’s cute btw, so thats what Maynard says. She looks awesome in her leather skirt, so plus points to the guys after her! Can be funny, can be dangerous, but still a good person at the end of the day.

Aaron (the monk on the far right)

-Fellow countrymen to Aniq, this guy from Sarawak has broken many hearts from what I hear. He’s funny, and pretty helpful too. Get to know him if you’re in need of ASSistance. Has been told to be pretty far away from the fine dining restaurant, but I doubt he’ll give up!

Zaha

-Only foreigner in the group, from Maldives. The name Maldives, the only thing I’ve ever seen it was when I was signing up for a forum and when I wanted to select the Country, Maldives would be above Malaysia. If it wasn’t for this girl, I think Maldives would remain a remote island off the coast of India to me until now. Quiet, but can be humorous, that’s what the whole group’s about! Gave me a nickname even, ANDU! hahahaha!

Min

-Notoriously known for being the best in restaurant practical class, being overly sarcastic and camwhoring whilst wearing a tiara. Independent, yet cannot control his laseristic mouth when it comes to dissing me. McB species, blood type C for cheeeeebye! hahahaha just kidding! Sarcastic la thats for sure, but he gets his jobs done.

Andy

-What can I say.. I’m not the best in the class like somebody, but I get my job done too, and then some more. Hopefully my good traits outweigh my bad ones, and nobody has a vendetta against me yet because there’s another 5 terms to go!

Phang

-The eldest in the group, somehow managed to find his way to Taylor’s to do Culinary Arts aside from running a freelance day job of an engineer of some sorts. The trustworthy photocopier, and is the wisest of the pack some say. Cheers to him on the time management!

So that’s my group after one term, and now you know them almost as much as I do. Who would know what monkeys they will turn into during the next term. We’ll just leave that to another blog in the future shall we. Until then, ta!

Wow, I doubt there’s anyone reading this anymore since it’s been quite a long while since I’ve posted anything. But nevermind, today I experienced something too special not to blog, ergo I shall blog about it.

I was the local Shell filling up on petrol when I noticed that my Gen2’s  fuel consumption is hiking to a critical point, a critical 10 liters per 100 kilometers to be exact. For those of you who don’t know, this calculates to about RM2.30 per 10 kilometers, and RM0.23 per kilometer. For a 1600cc local made car, this is as bad as a goat hunt gone wrong because my dad’s 2000cc German consumes only RM0.18 per kilometer, and that’s also on the high side mind you!

So it hit me, maybe I was driving a *bit* too fast, and maybe I should keep the volume down when in housing areas. Well after I left the station it was still raining so I didn’t have the mood to go home and open the gate in the wet so me and Jimmy went to get some grub at the mall, after which I went back home for around 4 minutes and went back out to head for Glenmarie to meet Ronny to pick something up from him.

On the way to Glenmarie a turbo Kancil bothered me, I always tend to get very heavy footed when things like this happen but this time I used my spare box of chi to calm myself down and just remain driving at less than 70km/h on the big road. As I was approaching Makro, still at a very slow speed, the roads were wet but it had stopped raining, and it was clear of cars on my side of the road. There was an 80 degree right hander coming up in about 300 meters.

Look left, look right, look back. Something doesn’t seem right, but something did at the same time. I was approaching the turn and my left hand slowly creeped to the gear knob and I engaged in second gear, the tacho was reading a low 3000rpm, my redline is 6000rpm. Then my hand continued creeping to the handbrake handle, now my hand had a mind of it’s own, and the next thing I knew I feinted (swerve left for a prompt moment and swerve into the right turn) the car and yanked on the handbrake.

This sounds a bit lala and fake la, but if you were there you’d know what I mean, it all happened slowly but very scarily. The rear end of the car started screeching, I could hear it, I thought I was still in control until 2 seconds later when I noticed the rear wouldn’t stop swaying out. My left hand still on the e-brake handle, right hand on the steering wheel. As the idea of spinning the car and possibly running into the divider came into my mind, the steering wheel started rotating to the left automatically, initiating a counter steer.

Whaddya know, I was drifting my Gen2.

The car recovered safely after sliding for about 5 seconds, fully through the corner and, the feeling that cannot be put in words was when I had to steer my car by looking through the left portion of the windscreen and I got a sugarless sugar shock shortly after, spent the whole night telling Jimmy and Adrian about it, aside from completing the Restaurant Theory assignment, hahah! Man, drifting really is for me, someday I’ll be out there on track for sure!

Hey! I’ve just arrived from college, it’s now 11-something and I’m around 20 minutes away from 18 year old-ness. Finally the wine and F&B assessments are over, and I can finally relax for at least a week doing the things I like to do. Going to return to RC soon now that Jimmy got himself a ride, the team is finally coming together.. Team Slowcars, hahah!

Actually no, I winged it and I winged it a lot for the F&B assessment. This is NOT good. But oh well, no point talking about it now. Today was the DC27(2) dinner, the whole thing was set for 12 pax which are Me, Alvin, Vincent, Jimmy, Elaine, Mischa, Phang, Leon, Min, Aniq, Hadi and Maynard. I had invited Wai Kheng the ‘imported player’ from DC27(1) the week before assuming that somebody will FFK the dinner, which thankfully Alvin did!

So long story short, the dinner was great! Food was awesome too, too bad the imported player sitting at the same table as me couldn’t take beef, which she did anyway I feel guilty, still. Sorry! Entree’ was a sirloin steak, flambe’d which just basically means set on fire or some sort like that. I like to call it the eyebrow burning cooking method, because I’m guessing it does burn the eyebrow of the person doing the flambe’ if he doesn’t do it right or adds half a bottle of white wine and brandy to the pan.

Dinner ended at 9.30, but since I am such a kind person, I sent Leon, Elaine and Jimmy home and so now I am finishing up on my restaurant assignment which Alvin is indeed very emotional about as per what I can see in his MSN personal messenger. Jangan marah bang! My goodness this blog looks and sounds like a bimbo blog. But nevermind lah, I am a bimbo sometimes these days. Wai Kheng can agree with me. Heheh! That’s it for now, more later, again, so sorry for the bimbo blog!

It’s always been there for me when I need it, it’s more subtle than a hyper girlfriend and it’s more forgiving than cholesterol. Why not? I love them a lot. Having long fingers I’ve always liked some nail to compliment them, clipped nails always make my fingers look short too.. God knows I’m a frickin’ hygienic person as I can spare 45 minutes of my life to make out with an oil blotter to make sure my face won’t reflect light from the sun and blind you, so most people should know that I keep my nails nice and clean.

The inner side of my nails, is like what my Chef Norizzan says about the chopping boards: it looks dirty, but it’s clean. Only for the chopping board it’s the other way around. Haha! My nails make me shift gears better, sometimes it turns on cats too! For some reason even my food tastes better when I eat with long, may I stress again, CLEAN nails. Sigh. Why do I have to clip my nails?? Since when were nails so feminine some guys would rather have their whole nail ripped out of their fingers and thumbs?!

Okay this post is freaking me out, I’m just going to go cut my fingernails now since the lecturers have been giving me a hard time about it, not to mention the new friends. Haih.

Sir Izuan, I’ve got the OST too, but I find Signal Fire as the most worthy, well, maybe ONLY worthy song to listen to

I dont know why but that song just lingers in my head a lot since I heard it during the ending credits of Spiderman 3. What used to be a superhero movie is now a love story, sigh.

For 3 consequent classes, I now have 3 assignments to complete and the earliest is due in another 6 days, while I’m leaving for Pulau Tinggi, the remote island nobody has ever heard of on a trip with some DT seniors. Man they’re weird. Anyways, I have a baaad feeling this is going to be another Redang trip for me, minus the fact that everyone on the Redang trip was giving me the silent treatment as if I have cooties or something.

Cooties. Cute word eh? Speaking of which, I’ve been told by many people that maybe, maybe if I fail to be a chef or even waiter some day, I could just resort to being a lala or something because apparently, my lala pose sells! heh heh! OH yes, I lost my phone two days ago at the college library and almost everyone in my group thinks I’m crazy because I’m happy about it, but actually I’m just sad because I’m happy.

Story is we were doing a photo shoot for the COMG 1111 assignment and I placed my lens cap on one of the book shelves. Eventually I left it there and proceeded with the shoot else where, then I MIGHT have just misplaced my phone somewhere during this time because IIRC I removed it from my pocket during when I was kneeling down and I THINK I placed it on another book shelf. What is it with this whole placing of articles on book shelves anyway?

So we went 10 storeys down and I went up to get my cap, then I realized that my phone is missing and I cant remember where I put it. I know what youre thinking, diu right. I called it and it was ringing but problem is it was on Silent, and not Vibrate mode which is a really dick move because I already had it in Vibrate, but changed it to Silent a few seconds later. *sigh*

The phone was to ring until about 11pm later that night, when I assume it ran out of battery. The thing that sucks is, I know it’s missing but at the same time I know no one found it yet so it’s like wanting to give up but there’s always a eh-why-not-try-again factor that spoils my plan to just go home and start looking for a new phone. Coupled with the fact that there were people helping me look for it, and looked even after I went off (sorry la, I’m too used to the ‘i dont give a shit’ crowd so this is a surprise to me), I was motivated to go on..

Man people in college are great. They’re so darn helpful yet attractive, and this is a very rare combination in my eyes. Thanks Natasha for all that sugar (it does help!), Richard and Wai Kheng for the continuous raiding of book shelves, Vincent for finishing his credit making calls to the phone (lol), Shane, Jimmy, Alvin and Elaine, and whoever else that helped me. Seriously, I am touched beyond manliness. Yes, manliness.

I must be crazy, it’s 3 in the morning and I’m as sleepy as a polar bear, and I have pastry at 9. As per what chinese would say; siao, man. I should go, until next time, if you find my phone, then please.. just dont go through my gallery. Silver, you have served me well and I bow to your patience especially when I threw you down a tarmac top street just to see if you’d get scratched on the back cover.

"..I could be stuck here for a thousand years, without your arms to drag me out"

Alright I’m worked up now! Finally I know how hypocrites and assumers find their stock to write crap about Malaysia, it’s MCDONALDS! Well not actually McDonalds, but rather the delivery service. Here’s my story.

It was Friday I think and everyone ditched the plan to go for teh tarik because they wanted to practice using the wire whisk so I cooked up a plan to go to McDonalds to get some nuggets first while waiting for Adrian to return from his seminar in Klang, but then suddenly I too felt some kind of force (lazy) stopping me.. argh! Perhaps it was Katharine on iTunes.. anyway.

Suddenly I remembered that McDonalds delivers up to 3am mah? so why not just give them a call and let them do the work. So I did, the operator was exceptionally polite despite the midnight call. At first the image of a friendly service from the ad on the telly was definetly not expected considering they pick those buggers off the street to be their delivery boys, but after the call I started thinking twice.

Keep in mind with Pizza Hut deliveries, they at least greet you. So my delivery arrived from the Section 9 McDonalds around 20 minutes later. Still impressed, I go to the gate to find the delivery guy there and a bit misplaced but I greeted him first – only to NOT get a reply!

Anywho, I’d put that aside for the better part coming. The operator told me it would cost RM12.56, but I misheard and prepared RM13.04. I open the gate, he passes me the food without saying anything leaving me AGAIN asking him what are the contents, only to get a moody answer as if he’s got PMS or something? So fark la, I hand him the money and would you know, he immediately wanted to leave without handing me my change..

Fine fine, I just stopped him and politely asked for the total, so now he gets the idea but he’s still staring at me not doing anything.. wtf, may I suggest returning my change? Instead he gives me back the 4 cents and shucks me off by saying he’s got no change, LIKE I CARE? Almost at boiling point here, and I conveniently reminded him that theres a balance of 48 cents and, get this, he actually sighed in anger! MOTHER@%?*&!!!!!!

Boiling point. Red screen. Buzzer. I’m just waiting to throw the change back at him now, sad case he couldnt calculate the change himself and only handed me back 35 cents before I placed it on his motorcycle and said ‘tak payah lah’ (no need lah) and slammed the gate on him, and that sums up the first and last time I use the McDelivery service!

Seriously ‘wipes, ‘kalau takde duit jadi mat rempit je laaa!’.

Aduhh.. I don’t even know where to begin. Well to start this post was actually a comment at first to reply to a blog post. But I eventually got so pissed, so confused and so frustrated with the writerand the blind jackasses that reply to the post unconstructively, that I’ll just put it up as a log as a tribute to these people, seeing as to it that this blog is an Anatomy Of A Stupid.

Guys, we live in a modern world where technology rules everything. We see naked foreigners in lockup cells, strangers pepper spraying Prime Ministers and Mat Rempits dashing through police roadblocks on a day to day basis; all thanks to technology. When one dumbfuck comes by and starts keystyling about some racism issue lets say, you can rest assure that he wasn’t the first to find out about it la. There would be news, videos, images and all kinds of shiet on the net, god knows especially opposition party websites to show it.

When you cant find any materials like this with relevance to the issue above, then I can gurantee you that THERE IS NO REAL ISSUE TO BEGIN WITH! Seriously folks, especially in the 21st century, nobody would actually be dumb enough to tolerate people that assumes every damn thing, and claims that this news couldn’t be published in the newspapers because we live in an Islamic country or the likes. Really. It is suicidal to believe jokers!

I honestly cant be fucked to bother about the writer, no, professional assumers because they will never stand down from their single brick wall of guesses and myths that daddy told me when I was a kid, but it’s the readers that I pity a lot. Most of them just read along and comment blindly! Dudes, it does indeed matter when you’re blind and you follow a bat. In other words? It makes you look like a frickin’ idiot! Dont just go "oh ya ya good post" bla bla bla when you don’t understand the blog itself! Please! I am begging you! You are only supporting an assumer that is lacking in knowledge!